Moving on

Posted: March 21, 2015 in Uncategorized

Everything is different now.
There’s tension that wasn’t there before.
Like a rubberband wound to damn tight, about to pop from too much damn exertion.
The problems were there but they  weren’t acknowledged. 
Is there a way to get passed this? Should we get passed this?
Should we continue down the same path that we are on?
Or should we move on and go our separate ways? 
So many questions. 
Zero answers.
There’s no trust.
There’s no communication. 
There’s just a void.
A void that might have been there before but was ignored. 
Overlooked
Or maybe it formed over night, or possibly with time.
But it’s there.
It’s vast.
A gapping black hole where love should be but instead it’s empty.   
Nothing.
That’s what we’ve become, nothing. What’s the point of fighting if only one person wants to fight.
If only one person is fighting. Selfishness.
It’s a big problem.
But who am I to judge when I am the exact same way.
Possibly a little less selfish for I have others to think about and who depend on me.
Possibly that’s our problem you have no one depending on you so you have no sense of responsibility. 
You have too much self-prestervation. Friends.
Maybe that’s all we should have been. We should have cut ties when things got hard but I couldn’t let go, I gripped you tighter.
Why?
I don’t know, it just felt right.
But does it still feel right?
I can’t say that I know the answer to that.
There’s too much going on, too much has been said and done that I can’t answer that question. 
I’m not sure that everything will be ok. This will always be in back of my mind. And all the cover ups and lies.
I’m sure I don’t know about all of them but I know about some.
I don’t think we want the same things. Our minds work on different levels and I honestly don’t think we can coexist the way we should.

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